Poetry, Brody McGee
i. the ritual is sacred
It begins knee-deep in muddy water
where there is no chlorine
to cauterize, to shoot up
my nose when we are girls
doing hand
stands
and don’t recognize this cesspit
of ourselves.
soon, they will pump us
with preservatives and package us up
pretty, so no one can see all the sticky scabs
all the spots going soft
all the tarry kisses
that taste like you will forget
like you are an animal
my only addiction is the chemical
purity,
not me, but clean. clean. clean.
bleached out and so white
it stains.
i don’t know but i know
where i am i have always been
in the centre
of this confluence. all rivers run together eventually.
alllriversruntogether, smoothing the poultice of all my
foremothers, all my sculptors in the margins.
i live in the affection of the artist
in the sweet preconception. the humid moment
before she is consumed by her creation.
they call me frankenstinian and
offer me their baptisms
when i am drenched in sweat and eaten alive,
on the precipice of a nightmare,
where i watch my father’s eyes
and see the truth.
ii. the ritual is sacred
close your eyes
tip back your head
into the hands of unspeaking women,
dancing naked over the family tree
which tomorrow, will be hacked down
to build the witch pyre and the paper
for the litanies.
iii. the ritual is sacred
let your hair clump into matts
kneel before your mother,
let her untangle you
with her cheap, plastic brush.
know you are unraveled
eating yourself and eating yourself and being eaten
bite off your tongue and lie
beneath granny’s sewing machine
she has done this before, she loves you, she loves you she will
unpick her seams for you, she will weave you
from her, from abrasions, from grass stains,
from layer on layer of dust-
skin cells- and endocarp rust,
know what you are
and live,
ab initio.
Brody McGee is a student from the middle of nowhere in Scotland. She explores psychoanalytical themes, mother-daughter relationships, and the experience of women through her work. Currently, she has a publication underway in the inaugural issue of Petrichor Gazette.